The word “nigger” is undoubtedly
one of the most hateful words known to Black people. In an age in which every
other word in hip-hop is “nigga”, it leads to the question, what is the meaning
of the word “nigga”? Who can use the word “nigga”? And what is the difference
between “nigger” vs. “nigga”?
When I heard the word “nigger” for
the first time, it did not come out of a Black persons mouth, rather a white
classmate in kindergarten. I didn’t know what I meant, however, I knew it was
not being used in a positive connotation. I remember asking my mom on what the
word meant, and she was in shock that a classmate would use the word at such a
young age. The racism that I felt at a mostly white school in kindergarten was
a lot. And it led to me changing schools. Even changing schools did not change
the fact that I was called a “nigger”. Throughout junior high I still faced
this form of discrimination because of my race. However, as I grew older, the
word “nigger” had different meanings for myself. Once I went to a more
integrated school, my Black peers would call me my “nigga” in a friendly manor.
“Nigga” used by Black folks replaced the word harmful word “nigger” that was
often used in derogatory ways by white people.
Once I became a high school
student, the word “nigga” was more frequently used within Black friends of
mine. We would call each other “nigga”. It was common day slang. However, the
word still has pain in it. When I hear the word “nigga” at times I still
remember the painful experiences of being called a “nigger” by non-Black folks.
However, saying “nigga” is a way of reclaiming a word that has caused a lot of
pain, and turned it into something more powerful. When I say “nigga” I am
conscious of its past roots and pain, however, “nigga” is completely a
different term than “nigger”. When “nigga” is used, it is reclaiming of a
negative word and turning it into something that is positive. It is also a
reminder of my ancestors and my past and current struggle.
When I was contemplating a synonym
to replace the word “nigga” it would most likely be “bruh”. Bruh to me is a
shortened slang for “brother”. When I say my “nigga’ in essence I am saying my
brother. When I say you are “my nigga” I am saying you are my brother because
of the linked-fate Black folk have with each other. The common experience that
Black people have is something that binds us together. The common ancestry, and
the common current and past struggle.
Unfortunately today the word
“nigga” used by a lot of people across different identities. I’ve had multiple
experiences of white people saying “nigga”, and with every time it has occurred
I have been pissed off to the point of wanting to inflict violence. This is a
result of the pain of being a 5 year old and being called a “nigger”. The pain
of the word “nigger” being used towards me throughout my educational
experience. The anger is also due to the fact that it is not someone from my
culture using that word. However, when another Black person says “nigga” to me,
it’s a completely different feeling.
Reclaiming the word nigga is a form
of nationalism because it is able to “revitalize and transform the struggle
against racial oppression”(XIV). When I say “nigga” it is reclaiming and
transforming the narrative of the struggle and the pain the word “nigger”
caused. When a Black person says “nigga” and it means “my brother”, it provides
a different feeling than the racist connotations that come with the term
“nigger”. This also demonstrates the nationalism within the word “nigga”. The
fact that I do not get upset when a Black person says it, reveals that it is a
word that has nationalist ties. The fact that I will never call a non-Black
person “my nigga” also reveals the nationalism that is within the word. When a
Black friend refers to me as a “nigga” I don’t feel any sense of anger or rage.
Rather a connection that binds us together as Black people. This is the polar opposite
of when a white person uses the word. The word “nigga” is a word that only
Black people should and are allowed to say.
The word “nigga” undoubtedly has
nationalist connotations. The word “nigga” when used by Black folk in common
day and it often times means brother. Both Malcolm X and Martin Luther King
would use “Negro” in their speeches and it was considered common day slang, so
why is it problematic when Black folks today refer to each other “nigga” is
used? I am not arguing that “nigga” is the first thing I identify as. I know
that I am a king, and that I am an Afrikan. However, no matter how conscious I
am in knowing that I am a king, I know that it will not stop me being pulled
over the by the cops. It won’t stop me from a white teacher referring to me as
Oscar Grant. Being Black in America
makes you a nigga because of the racialized institutions that oppress us everyday.
The fact that I recognize that I am a nigga, is a way of survival and
understanding of the land in which I live in. Since “nigga” is used as a synonym
to brother, I am reclaiming the word in a positive way while still consciously
knowing the struggle of my ancestors as Black people in America.
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